Posts tagged as:

Love

In Celebration of Valentines Day – 14 Ways to Love Yourself More

Let’s get straight down to it…and spread the positive word that Valentines Day should be just as much about self love as it is romantic love…

1. Dress the way you want.  Don’t be too concerned with what’s currently doing the fashion rounds or what anyone says should and shouldn’t go together or is ‘right’ for your body.  If you love the way you look and feel in something then you’re dressing with love.

2. Give yourself a break.  If you are harder on yourself than anyone you know it’s totally time to give that up.  It’s not serving you or making you a better person.  Let’s move on shall we?

3. Treat yourself.  No money spent on you for something that brings a smile to your face and joy to your heart is ever wasted.  Go get it girl!

4. Get yourself a wee bit more organised; or even totally organised.  Might sound super boring but if you can manage to get yourself out from under that pile of paperwork/dishes/general gunk and stuff, you will have so much more creative and loving flow in your life.

5. Take stock.  Of your surroundings, relationships, commitments and influences as a whole.  Promise yourself that now is the time to only engage with people and things that fully serve you and help you be your best.  Gently let go of the rest.

6. Do something you love to do or even think you might love to do.  If you’ve always wanted to try yoga, web design, cake decorating or scuba diving show yourself some love by delving into your curiosity and doing it.  Life’s for living.

7. Recognise once and truly for pity’s sake end of the earth all time no holds barred freakin’ I’m really gonna get it this time…that you only get one body.  Love it.  Nurture it.  Be kind to it.  And stop obsessing.  Enjoy the ride beautiful you in the form you’ve been given. 

8. Throw away your scales.  Don’t waste a moment more concerned with a number.  Your life will be over before you know it and what you weighed will be utterly inconsequential.

9. Sleep.  Seriously.  If you’re feeling overwhelmed and frazzled find some time to just lie down and rest.  Fall asleep for as long as you need to so your body can recharge.  Sometimes it’s the most simple but loving thing you can do to ‘reset.’

10. Ask for what you want.  Really want.  At work.  In bed.  From your Mother.  Of yourself.  Prepare yourself for getting it.

11. Show yourself the kindness you show others.  If it’s good for them honey – it sure is good for you too.  Buy yourself flowers.  Write a lovely note encouraging you and tuck it away ready to read again on your birthday.  Talk positively to yourself.

12. Enough with the comparisons.  While your comparing your bank balance, body, wardrobe, children’s abilities or entire life to someone else worrying yourself inside out your life is not as ‘good’ as theirs is – they’re living it.  You can’t have their body or children or life.  You’ve got something better – yours.  There’s nothing to compare.  She’s incomparable.  You’re incomparable.  Love and leave.  Then live.

13. Eat what you want.  Yeah that.  Drop the deprivation, diets and unmet desires for food you want to have but for a myriad of punishing reasons tell yourself you shouldn’t or can’t have.  Have faith in your body by giving it what it tells you it wants in a mindful, calm, loving way.  And goddamn it – enjoy it.

14. Start something.  That dream or goal or wish or want that’s been tucked in the back of your head and heart for months or even years now?  Get it out of your head and onto paper, a vision board, into a conversation and your life.  Show yourself true love by following through with what’s tugging at your heart instead of just thinking about it.

Happy Valentines Day Beautiful You. 

Tagged as: Body Image, Body Love, Comparisons, Creativity, Curiosity, Deprivation, Diets, Dreams, Fashion, Food, Goals, Kindness, Life, Living, Love, Mindful Eating, Organisation, Overwhelm, Positive Thinking, Positivity, Self Love, Sleep, Valentines Day, Weight

{ 17 comments }

Redefining Valentines Day + A Giveaway!

I’m delighted today to present this guest post by Sue Muller, the inspirational owner (or ‘Chief Chick!) of the wonderful new business and blog Smile Chickie.   The mantra of Smile Chickie is to smile more, love more, laugh more and worry less.  Sounds like a great idea to me!  I absolutely love Sue’s take on Valentines Day which in case you haven’t been bombarded with all things hearts, chocolates and romance is…next week!  Read on and get to know Sue’s quirky sense of humour better and for a gorgeous giveaway too. 

Is that February 14th I see looming on the horizon, all sparkly and shiny???

Beckoning, full of hope and joy for all of the beautiful, perfect, ‘loved up’ couples out there?

Yes, yes I do believe that it is…

Now, don’t get me wrong I love, love, love, LOVE!

Not for one second do I begrudge the happiness of those lucky people out there who are blissfully knee deep in it and living their own happily-ever-afters.  I believe that, on Valentines day, they all fully deserve to have their names written in the sky and truckloads of flowers to be delivered to their door.  To be spoilt and pampered.  My heart smiles for all of them and it gives me hope.

But sadly, that is not everyone’s experience on Valentines Day…

Along with the commercializsation and publicity surrounding Valentines Day, which seems to grow more omnipresent with each passing year, we sometimes forget that there are a lot of people being painfully and publically reminded that they are alone.

For a lot of people it’s a really hard day.

Of course, the unattached do realise that so much of it is merely commercial crap, and not what the essence of the day should be all about .   You would not be human though,  if it did not  give your insecurities and wounds at best, a  tiny, little painful poke.

Now there are not many chicks who do not have a tiny memory tucked away/squished down there somewhere inside, of being the only one who didn’t get a card at school, of unrequited, lost love, divorces, separations, being broken up with ON Valentines d]Day or just before (how convenient)….even of times when you were with someone who ‘forgot’ or deliberately didn’t acknowledge it because he ‘didn’t believe in it.’

Ah the bittersweet scars of loving and living and learning…

Whilst it’s great to be in a loving, romantic relationship, so far, what I have learnt for myself on this journey called life is that regardless of whether you are currently ‘loved up’ or in the single zone, it is so important to nuture your own emotional health and self love.  After all, in order to love anyone else properly, you need to start with loving, valuing and appreciating the one person who is always going to be there for you no matter what..  And that’s lovely you!  Because this is the foundation upon which all of the other relationships that come your way are built.

So this is a shout out to chickies everywhere  – let’s redefine Valentines Day so that it brings joy to EVERYONE.  Lets choose to spend it laughing and smiling with the special chicks in our lives that stick by us on the rollercoaster of life, and continue to love us through thick and thin.  Lets invest some time loving, appreciating and nurturing our lovely selves.

Because we are worth it.

Lets make some plans chickies.  Lets make sure we are not home alone watching everyone else having a great  Valentines Day on the evening news this year.  There is still time!  Why don’t you:

Phone a single friend and organise dinner, a drink, or girlie catch up.

Schedule something fun and cheerful that is sure to make you smile.

Buy YOURSELF a bunch of flowers.

In a perfect world… maybe we would all be out having a romantic candlelit dinner and hot sex on Feb 14th but let’s face it, life does not always work out that way.  It’s not always a white picket fences, puppies and rainbows, and that’s ok.  But we do all deserve to smile and we all have the power to make that happen for ourselves without having to rely on some dude to decide to turn up on our doorsteps with a mother load of flowers and chocolates.

happy valentines chickies xx

Thank you Sue!  I absolutely love your redefinition of Valentines Day and how maybe it’s time for us to see the day not just as one for romantic love, but one that’s about friendship love and self love too.  If you love Sue’s smile chickie style – you must check in with her chick chat blog  (too funny!) and her gorgeous range of newly produced smile chickie products.  Sue has written an inspirational petite book called Smile Chickie and she has kindly given me one to give away to beautiful you readers.  And just because it’s the loved up season I’m going to throw in a nice surprise of an extra gift too…but it’s a surprise.  Just trust me – I do good gifts!

All you need to do to enter is answer this question – Do you think Valentines Day needs to be redefined or do you love it just the way it is?  Open to all worldwide with entries needing to be please be in by February 17th.  Much love and good luck!

Tagged as: Friendships, Giveaways, Guest Post, Love, Relationships, Romance, Self Love, Smile Chickie, Sue Muller, Valentines Day, Women

{ 25 comments }

You Are Lovable at Any Size

This post is inspired by the latest promotional ads for the 2012 Biggest Loser which are trying to sell you, me and the world the concept that for any person to be deserving of love – ‘ready for love’ – they must lose weight and be thin.  They’re wrong.  You can love yourself and be loved at any size.  Any.

 Image: The Examiner

Listen Up Beautiful You 

I’ve got something to say.

It’s important and I need you to read it, hear it and let it morph into your soul.  Really, really, morph.

You are beautiful and divine just as you are.

You do not need to take up less space in this world.  Your fat, curvaceous, tall, big, broad, voluptuous, curvy, adipose, magnificent self can take up all the space you deem you so require.

What shape or size you are has nothing to do with how lovable you are.

To be ready for any form of love you want or need you do not need to diet or whittle yourself away.

The love you are and the love you are attracting or not attracting in your life is not related to your shape or size.  It’s all what’s happening in the space between your ears.  Truth.  Own it and work on it if you need to.  Do it for you.  Beautiful You.

Don’t let anyone or anything attempt to convince you that you will never meet the man or woman of your dreams unless you meet a strict media driven requirement of being thin, perky, shiny and thin.

Get ready to move on if you think for one moment that there are not people out there having mind blowing, outrageously good and hot physical intimacy and sex.  They are.  They really, really are.

Untangle yourself from any notion, noggin, thought or entire belief system that the reason you aren’t lovable or beautiful or attractive or sexy or desirable is because of your shape or size.  I don’t need to see you to know this.

Move on gorgeous one.  Move on from any thought or any belief that you have to be smaller, thinner, less than you are right now to feel and know and have the love you deserve.  Give that love to yourself and watch others illuminate from your example.

Give that love to yourself and see a world of love open up to you.

Tagged as: Diet, Fat Acceptance, Intimacy, Love, Media, Romantic Love, Self Love, Sex, Shape, Size, The Biggest Loser, Thin, Thin Ideal, Weight

{ 14 comments }

Beautiful You Book Review: Amongst Sisters by Amanda Foxon-Hill

I’m delighted to present a book review and interview with Amanda Foxon-Hill today about her inspirational book ‘Amongst Sisters.’   This beautiful book is a true treasure and has been the perfect summer holiday reading for me throughout the festive season.  ’Amongst Sisters’ is a celebration of the female form and women’s lives.  Themes of beauty, confidence, love and acceptance abound in it’s colourful pages with gorgeous photographs by Lucia De Giovanni.  Amanda kindly agreed to tell us a little more…

What inspired you to write ‘Amongst Sisters?‘  After working in the beauty industry (as a   chemist) for the past 13 years, I have been increasingly worried about our desire to deny and wipe out anything that is unique and interesting about us, such as the odd wrinkle, scar, birthmark, the shape of eyes or nose and our skin texture.  I’m also concerned that as free women with many choices and opportunities we now seem to be focusing almost totally on our looks and specifically young doll-like looks.  I don’t believe that this is healthy for our self-esteem or personal growth and see it as a consequence of our fix-it, need-it-now, ‘teenager-like’ society that prefers to scoot across the surface rather than dig deep and find real treasures.  I didn’t want to remain part of the problem, but still loved my job, so I wanted to write in a way that got women thinking more deeply about themselves and their identity.  We should be able to feel proud of our journey and wear the marks and badges of a long and fruitful life with pride.

What are the messages you are most hoping women will take away from ‘Amongst Sisters?’

That we are all the same in as much as we all have a right to kindness and compassion and should be accepted and loved  

That we need to carve out time to really talk and start meaningful conversations Amongst Sisters  

That it is a sign of strength and maturity rather than weakness when we share thoughts about our deepest feelings, fears and problems  

That we deserve to be healthy and that means living our lives with our eyes and minds wide open  

That we should seek happiness and play  That our sensuality should be owned and used wisely 

Thank you Amanda.  I think those take away messages are about as good as anyone could hope for when reading a book targeted  directly at women.  ’Amongst Sisters’ is a wonderful hard cover coffee table book that would make a truly beautiful gift for your sister, Mother or friend.  It’s vibrant and positive messages from over fifty contributors are the perfect antidote for the airbrushed and glossy magazines we are bombarded with constantly, and a reminder that there are ‘reads’ out there that can become a part of our library forever and be something we pass on to younger girls in our lives we love.  ’Amongst Sisters’ is available for purchase here.

Tagged as: Acceptance, Amanda Foxon-Hill, Amongst Sisters Book, Beauty, Beauty Industry, Book Review, Compassion, Confidence, Kindess, Love, Lucia De Giovanni, Reading, Real Beauty, Self Esteem, Women

{ 0 comments }

Happy Holidays Beautiful You!

Happy Holidays Beautiful You! 

I send you much love, peace and good wishes for a festive season as wonderful as you.  May it be filled with all the things you are hoping and wishing for.

Thank you for your presence here with me.  I treasure you.

Image: Patricia Awapara

Tagged as: Christmas, Festive Season, Holidays, Love, Peace

{ 2 comments }

Skinny Water Shame

To receive the love, attention, success and happiness you want in life you must be thin and beautiful.  There are no exceptions. 

That’s piffle of course but the cultural messaging of thin equals beautiful, successful and happy is pervasive and unavoidable.  It’s in TV drama’s and sitcoms, advertising for cereal, jeans and perfume, (to name just a few) radio commentary, magazine shoots and stories and of course the weight loss industry.  It screams at us in both images and words as well as opinions.  And it can be hard to resist, bounce back from and ignore. 

The way to ignite that resistance in not just one person but entire groups, schools, communities and people as a whole is to become truly literate and media and consumer savvy about just what we are being ‘fed’ at any given time.  Once we know what is really going on – the agenda behind the advertising or messaging so to speak – then we can really see something for what it truly is and, if need be, rightly put it in its place.  That’s why from time to time you will see me do a post here at Beautiful You about things like the following product.  I want you to know about it, savvy up, and then shout proudly from the rooftops that you will not have any advertising executive dictate to you what sort of life, love or level of success or happiness you will ever experience.  As if.

Case in point.  The bunch of laughables from Skinny Water who would not only like to try and sell you water under the banner of it having no calories, but impress upon you that if you buy it you will of course become or stay skinny, and because, you know, ‘skinny always gets the attention.’   This sort of product and advertising burns for me at so many different levels with this post at Sociological Images really summing up the grassroots of how I feel:

“Despite paltry efforts to market itself as healthy, Skinny Water is instead perpetrating the cultural message that the best — or only — way to ensure that women get attention is by being skinny.  This of course positions them well to try to push their product on those women who have been pulled into this lie.  In fact, Skinny Water is doing precisely the opposite of what a health-conscious company and product should be doing.  Promoting the idea that those who are skinny deserve attention more than others creates communities that support harmful diet-related behaviors and disordered eating for the goal of a wispy appearance.  Not to mention reinforcing the ever-present undercurrent of bias against the overweight — or even normal weight! — it reinforces the idea that women’s size and appearance is the most important thing about them.”

It’s body shaming messaging and advertising at its absolute worst. 

Our aim is to make you feel so bad about your potentially ‘non-skinny’ body that you will feel compelled to purchase our product because we will not only be able to give you the body that we believe you should have, but the attention and glory filled life you want to go with it.  And no….the fact they are selling water under the banner of it having no calories has not escaped me.  I’m just genuinely not sure what to say about that attempt to bypass the intelligence of consumers who are of course perfectly aware that water, on the whole, already has no calories.  Mind boggling.  

I’m incredibly chuffed to report that the best thing possible that could have happened to this ridiculous ad has indeed occured and it has been pulled.  Now my fervent hope is that people boycott the actual product to the point where it is a miserable failure for the shameful way it is trying to make people feel and the negative culture it contributes to and because the best way to drink water (whether you choose to filter it or not) is straight from the tap.  

What do you think Beautiful You?  Are we getting smarter on the whole in seeing what’s truly behind some of these advertising campaigns or are they much easier to fall for than I’m hoping they are?  Whatever the case may be – please know this. 

You do not need to be skinny, or in fact any determined shape or size to be beautiful, happy and successful. 

If there’s any message that needs to be thrown out with a truckfull of this water – it’s that one. 

Tagged as: Advertising, Attention, Beautiful, Happiness, Love, Media Literacy, Skinny Water, Success, Thin Culture

{ 1 comment }

← Previous Entries