People send me the most amazing things. And this postcard is certainly one of them.
Experiencing an eating disorder, or indeed any mental illness, can be a lonely and isolating experience. I have often heard from people experiencing eating disorders that they have this feeling of isolation very acutely because people around them struggle to believe they are unwell. In many instances people believe it is only if you are emaciated that you have a serious eating disorder or indeed are unwell at all. Nothing could be further from the truth.
There are people all around you that may be experiencing an eating disorder but you simply don’t know. Why? Because you cannot tell if someone has an eating disorder simply from their appearance. Eating disorder sufferers come in all shapes, sizes, ethnicities and of course can be either gender. All deserve empathy, compassion, understanding and access to the best treatment possible to begin a path to recovery.
Heart felt thanks She Takes Flight for drawing this beautiful postcard. It’s poignant and beautiful. Not unlike yourself.
Can you relate to an experience of people not ‘seeing you’ or what might have been really going on because of your appearance? I think more of us have than we know.
{ 29 comments… read them below or add one }
Most people never knew I was eating disordered for most of my life; I maintained an “average” (sometimes overweight) body weight for the most part. Ironically, although I looked fairly healthy on the outside, if I were still as sick as I used to be (and not in recovery), it’s very likely that I would’ve had a heart attack by now. I am 28.
I hope, I hope, that more and more people will grasp this truth so beautifully portrayed by She Takes Flight.
Hi Marya – I completely agree and hope that many people see artwork like this and really learn more about how eating disorders may present. All the very best with your continuing recovery. It sounds like you have courageously come a long way already.
Thank you so much, Julie! And thank you especially for promoting awareness and positive inspiration. Keep up the good work!
Being a big person & having an eating disorder is hard. I’ve been bulimic for about a year now and one of my friends found out – who then passed it on to other people who judged me & didn’t believe me because I am a big girl.
I’m sick of the stigma that you having a eating disorder because you are skinny. Life is as hard for us as it is or everyone else, so why are we treated so different :,(
The quicker people realise That we all come in different shapes & sizes the better. X
Misunderstoodeyes – I’m sorry you are struggling right now which of course can only be made worse by others misunderstanding and judging you. People with eating disorders DO come in all shapes and sizes which quite honestly, is not something that should be the most important thing we recognise. It should just be that if someone says they are struggling with an eating disorder – that is all that is required for someone to receive compassion, support and help.
I hope you are connected in with a great professional who is supporting you with your bulimia. If not, please do feel free to contact me. I wish you all the very best.
Hi Julie,
I really appreciate you getting back to me about this. It has been very hard, but we must soldier on =)
I am not in contact with a therapist as of yet, but i will do, soon.
I understand that it must be much harder for the thinner people because everyone connects “skinnyness” with an eating disorder– so they must get alot more negative attention then the “bigger” population do. I just wish people would realise that no one is perfect, there is no “perfect size” — its the poisonous magazines and magic retouching that causes this, and we just follow along with it like its the “norm”
People need to wake up… its such a waste of life :’(
That’s my pleasure. Do reach out for that help as in my experience it is the support of professional people that is so often the turning point in people getting well and launching their recovery path. I wish you much health and happiness.
i always smile. I mean, when I arrive somewhere I just =)))) smiiiiile. I remember perfectly a guy once saying to me “you’re always smiling! life’s good for some of us, huh?”
well, I kept my stupid smile, nodded and just went away… no one could know how miserable I was feeling. even today, i still struggle with eating disorders and low self-esteem and people just think i’m a “oh-so-happy-and-lay-back-person”.
my dream is to get better and help others. getting better and asking for help is the hardest
Barbara – It sounds like you are living with a mask of pain which is really hard to manage. While there is lots to be said in ‘faking it until you make it’ with a smile and positive attitude when not feeling well – if it stops people seeing what is really going on and that you need compassion and support, it’s often not a helpful thing.
It’s wonderful that you have a dream to get better. Wanting to get well is the first and most vital step to recovery from anything that needs healing. While it’s lovely that you want to help others – doing it for yourself is really the key to long term wellness. I know that asking for help can be hard but please know there are many wonderful professionals out there that could make an enormous difference in your life. Please do reach out for help to make that dream come true. I am here if you wish to contact me for further support.
Thanks Julie. Whilst I had recovered from anorexia…it has come back to haunt me following a series of stressful events. Never would I have thought it would come back… It’s a strong reminder that those of us who have struggled with eating disorders, that we must always be on watch for those signs and symptoms before it takes hold of us again.
I hate the damn bastard and hope that it leaves me soon..I urge all sufferers to keep on fighting. An eating disorder can only lead to one thing, despite what it tells you.. misery and ultimately a slow death. Keep hanging in there..together we will win.
Yes Moonstone! You will win. I believe that and can hear the tenacity in your words.
It’s so common for people with an eating disorder to experience a reoccurrence or ‘slips and bumps’ along the path to wellness. Stressful events can certainly bring that on and I wish you all the best in challenging it and getting back to your true self without the eating disorder hanging around you.
Don’t lose hope. The fact you have been well before means you surely can and will be again.
What a powerful depiction of the diversity of eating disorders. Beautiful.
Thank you Ashley. It is a beautiful depiction indeed as is the young lady who sent it to me. I hope she realises how many lives she is touching with her work.
Great illustration of how people who struggle with Eating Disorders are trapped in bodies of all shapes and sizes. Thanks for posting this. We need to spread the word so people take eating disorders more seriously.
Hi Rebecca – Yes, we absolutely do need to spread the word. There are still so many myths about eating disorders and thinking you can tell if someone has one is certainly one of them. Thanks for dropping by.
This is such an amazing portrayal of how eating disorders are all serious but come in all shapes and sizes. There is no one eating disorder “look” and it is very important that people realize you don’t have to be emaciated to be sick.
Hi Alex – It is isn’t it! I can’t take any of the credit. It all belongs to the young artist. I am emailing her today to let her know that her beautiful work has now gone somewhat viral and that I’m sure it is having a positive impact on many people.
Thank you so much for posting this…it’s a message that so many need to hear.
Thanks Katie. I entirely agree!
I LOVE this post card. I have 15+ years of recovery from anorexia and bulimia. Never, ever was I underweight. For so long I felt like a failed ED patient. At my lowest weight I looked “normal” to others. Puking 5-20 times a day made my skin turn grey, it made my hair fall out, it made me too weak to stand. It never made me skinny. In time having an eating disorder just felt like one more thing that I had failed at.
Today I have everything. EVERYTHING! A great life. An amazing family that I co-created with my husband. I am a sane wife, mom, friend and worker. What I (still) don’t have is a skinny ass. It’s a trade I accept.
Hi KL – Congratulations on your recovery. It sounds like you have pulled yourself through some very dark times and are now happy. That’s what really counts!
An illustration of pure brilliance. Simple, but brilliant!
Over the past 12 years, I have looked like all three of the middle women represented in this illustration, changing shapes as my Eating Disorder changed shape also, and no matter what size, the eating disorder is still as lethal and as serious as the previous shape and size.
I use to be like you too Barbara, but I eventually crashed as I could not keep up the facade. I hope that you are receiving help and that you, along with all other sufferers, can beat this disorder too, or at least be able to successfully manage it!
peace and love
Thanks for dropping by Jessi. I entirely agree. The illustration is amazing and the young woman who has drawn it should feel so proud of the impact it is having.
Wonderful image, and wonderful of you to bring this to everyone’s attention! In many ways, I am often struck by the fact that appearing normal externally ( a “healthy appearing weight, for instance) is even riskier than someone appearing emaciated. The latter is identified as being at risk, and generally supported in recovery. The former’s struggles remain largely unknown, sometimes to the individual her/himself, sometimes because they don’t feel deserving of treatment because they are a “normal” weight.
Hi Lori – You are absolutely right that people who may not be ‘seen’ to have an eating disorder do struggle greatly to ask for help or elicit the support and empathy of others. It’s images like this and further advocacy work that I really hope will see that change.
Wow! I honestly can’t believe it!
Believe it Emma! Thank you for sharing this incredible image with us all. By doing so you have had an amazing impact.
Well I was researching to see if anyone else has the same problem as me.. so far I don’t see anyone. I suffer from all three disorders… Some times I eat way way too much, sometimes its because its something to do and sometimes its because I feel depressed. Sometimes I eat.. and puke for feel bad for eating (i’ve gotten good enough where i don’t even need to stick anything down my throat).. Or I feel like I wont accomplish losing weight if I eat at all.
It’s a twisted battle I struggle. And has gotten worse since I’ve gained most of my weight back. I use to go to the gym excessively. Then I stopped because I couldn’t afford it. I don’t know if I’ll ever be well.
In my mind.. I don’t wanna be a skeleton but I hate being over weight and was always told I was a bad person for it. I’m 26.
Hi Sophie. Thanks for dropping by and commenting. You are not alone and please don’t give up hope or belief in yourself. Recovery from an eating disorder is possible and if there is anything I can do to support you please do contact me. I’m here to help even if just over email.
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