As you all know, I’m participating in and sharing with you, all that I am learning from the Inner Mean Girl Cleanse as a Self Love Ambassador. The first of six weeks of Inner Mean Girl Reform School has me giving up gossip and inspiring you to do the same.
I’m sure that most of us would like to say, or think, that we don’t gossip. It seems like such a terrible, wasteful and mean thing to do. I would hazard a reasonable guess though that most of us do gossip, or at least have gossiped at some point in time in our life. I’ll be the first to put up my hand and say I have.
When I used to think of gossip, I equated it with the bitchy, mean girl type of talk that involves the spreading of rumours that could dramatically hurt someone’s feelings. It is that of course, and can do untold damage, but I think gossip is actually much more pervasive than that in it’s ‘everydayness.’ Gossip is when we talk about our sister’s new boyfriend in less than glowing terms. When we speculate how long our girlfriend’s new relationship will last. When we give up our negative opinion to others on the house our friends just bought. Gossip doesn’t have to be overtly malicious. It’s often made up of throw away comments, seemingly harmless talk and secretly shared tidbits.
Some people mistakenly may think that while gossip is not a nice thing for the person being gossiped about, it doesn’t really have a great deal to do with the person actually doing the gossiping. Not so. If anything, gossip says more about the person gossiping than it does anyone else. It means someone is using words in a negative and draining way and I truly believe prompting the great likelihood that they will think it acceptable to think and talk about themselves in a negative way too. Welcome to an Inner Mean Girls dream scenario!
So…how do you think you could go giving up gossip and negative talk about others (and even negative talk at all!) for at least 7 days? Sound like a positive thing to do for yourself and others? You bet it does. Here are some tips on making it happen.
The best antidote to gossip is to only talk about others how you would like them to talk about you. “Do unto others” – that wonderful old standby. It really never goes out of vogue.
Stop. Take a breath. Think. When we think consciously about the motivations behind what we say it improves our chances of only saying things that are positive and meaningful.
We all want to feel wonderful about ourselves and Beautiful You is all about that. We are the main driver in our own life for making that happen, but we should never underestimate our personal power in making it happen for someone else too. Be someone who lifts others up – encourages them, talks positively to and about them and wants the best for them always. This is such a strong antidote for gossip as no person who wants this genuinely for another, would gossip about them.
Be mindful of celebrity gossip too! All those magazines and tabloids out there that are printing stories filled with rumours, innuendo, maybe’s, he said and she said fodder, are not adding anything to the world. Only detracting. If you read these magazines and are buying in to celebrity gossip – is there maybe another type of magazine you could consider? Something that is positive, uplifting and filled with content that adds meaning to your life? They do exist!
You can do it Beautiful You! I know because you are here and reading this blog that being the best person you can be, is something that interests you. There are of course a myriad of ways to go about that and giving up gossip and talking to and about others from a place of genuine love is just one of them. It may just be one of the most important things you do for others and yourself. Our Inner Mean Girl’s that talk negatively inside our head, trying to drag us down all the time, to my mind, are gossip personified. They are that voice coming out of us talking about others, in a way that is not meaningful and therefore giving their internal voice to us that same message – you are not meaningful enough either.
Well…that voice is wrong Beautiful You. You are a wise, wonderful and giving person who doesn’t need gossip – and you certainly don’t need an Inner Mean Girl. Challenge yourself to give up gossip for the next 7 days. Set yourself a goal. Make a conscious decision and see what positive changes it brings to your life. Love to know how you are travelling over the week so please do share in a comment about your gossip free travels.
Week one class dismissed!
Tagged as:
Celebrities,
Communication,
Feelings,
Gossip,
Inner Mean Girl,
Magazines,
Mindfulness,
Positivity,
Rumours,
Self Love
When I used to think of gossip, I equated it with the bitchy, mean girl type of talk that involves the spreading of rumours that could dramatically hurt someone’s feelings. It is that of course, and can do untold damage, but I think gossip is actually much more pervasive than that in it’s ‘everydayness.’ Gossip is when we talk about our sister’s new boyfriend in less than glowing terms. When we speculate how long our girlfriend’s new relationship will last. When we give up our negative opinion to others on the house our friends just bought. Gossip doesn’t have to be overtly malicious. It’s often made up of throw away comments, seemingly harmless talk and secretly shared tidbits.
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Having recently been at the receiving end of gossip and a series of untruths being shared about me… I know how it feels to be on the other end of this… and it's not nice.
I did an afternoon self-development course when I left high school and this was one of the major things I took from the course. Gossip is ugly for the person being gossiped about, but for ourselves too.
Thanks for the reminder. What a great lesson to have. x
Hi Chantelle – What an awful experience for you. I think that so many people mistakenly believe that gossip is really not that big a deal, when in fact it is. Well done to you for having done that course. I am sure that it not only has benefitted you but lots of others you have come into contact with as well.
I completely agree! I have a great friend who always says, "make sure your side of the street is clean and you'll never have anything to worry about". Words to live by.